Sunday, August 8, 2021

The Arguments Against Church Attendence



It has been a busy, fun, and blessed summer! Unfortunately, a lot the busy-ness carried over to Sundays and I have not been to church in a while. It felt really good to be there today!

My Mom shared something on Facebook the other day that said, "The danger of missing church is soon you won't miss it." 



That's real talk right there. 

That's also proof y'all just go to church out of habit and so it doesn't mean anything to you.

Honestly, some Sunday's that's true. We do just go out of habit. Don't forget, brushing our teeth is also a habit, but that doesn't keep it from benefitting us and those around us.

Sunday is the one day I get to sleep late.

I. Hear. You. So does God. There are many bible references that discuss the importance, the need, and the benefits of getting enough rest. There are many bible references that let us know He gives us rest and He renews our strength. Look closer. It's probably the other things in your life that are draining you, not church.  Church is where you can go to renew and revive, not the something that's "gotta give."



The outdoors and nature is where I feel closest to God not in a building.

I am so happy that you have found a place to commune with God. How blessed you are! Many of Jesus's disciples were outdoorsy (fishermen) too. Makes sense to me.  God has created some amazing lakes, prairies, mountains, beaches etc. for us to enjoy. He also reminded us to gather together to encourage each other and to build up each other. So go out there, get right and get filled up; but then come back to church and lift up others, because some weeks it's not about you. 



One time someone who went to church treated me awful.

First, I'm sorry you were hurt. That is not okay. However, taking a step back from that incident, I bet you can think of people who have been ugly to you that didn't go to church. Did that keep you from going to school? Or to the grocery store? Or from driving in traffic? Someone else's ugliness should have nothing to do with your beauty.

Church people are all so "judge-y"!

Good news! If you feel like ALL the people of a certain group behave a certain way, then you should have no problem fitting in with judge-y people! We all know no group is absolute. Some might be, many will not be. 

Yeah, well Christians are supposed to be and do better. 

That would be so awesome! Except that's not how it works. The difference between Christians and other people is that we acknowledge the presence and accept the grace of a living God. We have not been guaranteed freedom from a sinful nature or from life's trials.  Sadly, We don't always act or even react as we should. Thankfully, we do have the promise of forgiveness and the assurance of an eternity in heaven, and so can you.



Just let it go. Just forgive someone. Just go. 




Saturday, July 3, 2021

My 15 Minutes of On-line Dating

 


A few months ago, over chips and queso, and in the middle of me having an unexpected melt down, one of my closest friends suggested that maybe I was ready to date. Nothing serious, just find a casual situation that includes dinners and the occasional movie or event. No commitment, no infringement on the independence that I am learning to explore and embrace. 

I laughed it off.

No. No, thanks. I'm good with things the way they are. Well...mostly. (ha ha, insert nervous laugh here) Furthermore, I am in no way ready. I many not ever be. (more odd laughter here) Nope. Not for me. Thanks.

But...

Later on that night. Alone in my living room. I began to seriously consider the suggestion. Facebook dating had popped up again and I do like dinner and movies. Curiosity won out and I started to mutter things like, "What could it hurt?" and "YOLO" and "Why not?"

I took a deep breath in and as I exhaled I clicked the button to select "Dating". Pretty much the same technique I use when firing a rifle.  I think somehow I knew the results might be just as destructive. 

First thing to do was choose a profile picture. Okay. Let's see. Not one that has any sort of memory related to it. No double chin pics, no cleavage pics, nothing that someone could look at and figure out where I live, no bad hair days.  I finally settled on one I like, and one that my mom says, "you're doing that smirky thing with your mouth"  Step one was harder than I expected.

Now what?

Answer some survey type questions. Ok, I can do that.

First question - How tall are you? 5'4"  Easy enough... I remembered Derek was 6'2". Perfect. My head fit just right on his chest in a good hug and just right on his shoulder while watching TV or drifting off to sleep...Whoa, whoa nope. I stopped myself. I realized I should not let my mind drift like that. I also noticed that temperature in my living room had begun to climb and the neck of my t-shirt had gotten smaller. 

Next question - education level. Bachelor's Degree. Wow. I realized that not just the neck of my shirt was smaller the whole shirt was suddenly tight and I was very aware of my breathing. I felt my stomach do a little flip.

Anxiety began to creep up my spine and then suddenly crashed over my head like a wave. "I cant do this!" I yelped, hit "exit", and tossed my phone to the other end of the couch like a hot potato. I stood up and paced some. Nope. This was a stupid idea. No way in hell am I ready for this and why is it so freakin' hot in here?!?

By this time I am full on talking to myself and the dog is just staring. I walked back and forth. I told myself to take a deep breath. I debated wine and then decided to make a glass of tea. Breathe, dammit! Is this a panic attack? So, what? Now you're going to have a panic attack worrying about whether or not you are having a panic attack? Get it together, Griffith! 

A little more pacing, and I was able to breath almost normal. I took my tea and headed back to my spot on the couch. I picked up my phone and I had 12 Facebook notifications. Humph? No, now 13. What? 14. Oh my gosh!!!! Canceling out had done NOTHING and my unfinished profile was OUT THERE and being judged by strangers. OMG!! What if they aren't all strangers?!! What if it's someone I know? The calmness I had almost just reached was completely gone and the question of whether or not I was in panic mode was answered!

Make it stop!

In my out-of-control state of mind, I absolutely could not figure out how to turn it off. I called my friend and begged/cried her to help me. She was looking for the link to unsubscribe. I was looking. The little notification count just kept climbing. FINALLY! She figured it out and I removed myself from further scrutiny and craziness. I apologized for using some ugly words. She began to laugh. I began to laugh. (Aren't good friends the best-est?) I felt silly, but I also felt rescued. I thanked her and we hung up.

Here is what I learned:

1. I am clearly not ready...yet

2. Facebook can find a match for you based solely on the fact that you are 5'4" and have been to college. Seems legit. Totally.

3. Apparently 80% the men who are into short college grads are all in their 60s, live in San Antonio, and do not speak English.

4. The other 20% will need help with their math homework and are looking forward to moving out of their Mom's garage apartment. Also, they play a lot of video games that I've never heard of.

5. Laughing at myself and hoping others will too is how I deal with most of things I get myself into and I am totally good with that.

Tuesday, June 1, 2021

Hello, Fresh...how you doin'?

Hey friends. I've been doing Hello Fresh for a couple of months. Thought I'd do a little review.

PROS:

1. Delicious - I've liked every one so far.

2. Fresh Ingredients - uh, Hello!? It's like they suggest that in the name.

3. Variety - I will eat the same thing over and over. Food subscription has helped me mix it up a bit.

4. Healthy options - you can choose lower calorie and other better for you choices. 

5. It's a LOT of food...this will also be listed as a "con"

6. No grocery shopping. 

7. No grocery shopping. - this deserves double mention. I really don't like the grocery store. Also, ALL the ingredients come in the bag so I don't have to make a second trip for the one thing I forgot.

8. Would be helpful for someone learning to cook. Lots of instructions and pictures.



Pork Carnitas

CONS:

1. It's a lot of food. Too much for a "Party of One". I get 2 servings of 2 meals and now I've had to go to every other week. I don't mind leftovers, but I get overwhelmed when I think something may go to waste.

2.  Cost - I'm really good at budgeting and shopping and I could do better on my own.

3. Awkward in my own kitchen - I ditched the instructions by the end if week 2. I know what I'm doing and it was taking me longer to do it their way.

4. It doesn't really save time. You still have to wash and chop the produce. You still have to make sauces. It's good food, but it's not fast food. I enjoy cooking, so this isn't really a big deal to me, but I expected something else I guess.

5. Dishes - back when I was following their instructions, there was a lot of "in another bowl" blah, blah, blah. I ain't...but that's just me.

6. Onions!! - Every recipe seems to call for onion. The problem is that the 2 serving recipes usually call for a half of an onion. Well, they can't send a half of an onion so I get an onion in every bag and that is starting to add up to a whole lotta onions!!

Recipes I've Tried:

Pork Carnitas Tacos

Lemon Tortelloni Palermo

BBQ Cheddar Pork Burgers

Homestyle Chicken &  Biscuit Pot Pie

Chicken Sausage Cavatappi Bolognese

Steak and Roasted Garlic Pan Sauce ( asparagus and mashed potatoes)

Philly - Style beef Melt

Pork Taquitos

While there are more pros than cons, I feel like I will probably cancel my subscription soon. I am too frugal. $60 a week is double my grocery budget and I still have to buy breakfast, sandwich fixins, dog treats cleaning supplies, etc. Larger families may have different math though.

That's really the only deal breaker for me...and the lifetime supply of onions!

Tuesday, May 25, 2021

And / Or


We lined up on the risers, all skinned knees and tank tops, toothless grins and ready to show what we had learned that week in Vacation Bible School. Spread out, we were told. Give yourself room. Scoot over. Okay, perfect. The piano began playing and we sang at the top of our little voices. We stretched one arm up and the other down. Then we spread both arms out as far as we could: 

 Deep and Wide, 
 Deep and Wide
 There’s a fountain flowing deep and wide.

 The next verse is where the choreography got tricky, because we switched it and started with our arms stretched out and then stretched them up and down. 

 Wide and Deep, 
Wide and Deep, 
There’s a fountain flowing wide and deep 

 Then that piano player would begin to play faster and faster with each verse. Scrawny kid arms going every which way trying to keep up. Giggling and singing. Flash bulbs from amused parents snapping Kodak pictures and little kids just learning to love Jesus. Such. Good. Times. 

This memory came to mind recently and I wondered about the origin of the simple little song we learned at VBS. A quick Google search found that it might be based on Ephesians 3:17-18

 I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ. 

 That’s a pretty great thing to be taught as children and reminded of as adults. 


 About 10 years ago, I attended a Mary Kay event where a successful woman spoke about priorities. She spoke about saying “no” to good so you can say “yes” to great. She talked about her struggle of trying to be everything to everyone. She was in all the clubs, her kids played all the sports, she baked the cookies and drove the carpool, and had her own business, and a house to keep in order and husband to love…you know the story. You most likely live the story or have at some point.

 She talked about how she was spread so thin that nothing ever got her full effort or attention. One day she realized she was cheating everybody. Her next statement has stuck with me. She said, 

“I would rather be 2 inches wide and 2 miles deep than spread 2 miles wide and only 2 inches deep.”

God’s love is Deep and Wide.
Our free will lets us choose Deep OR Wide. 

Believe it or not, it’s okay to choose deep because God has it covered. He has a plan for all of it. We are not called to do all of the things. We are asked to do the thing.

You may be thinking, “Okay, great. What’s the ‘thing’?” What is MY thing? It might be something you already love doing. Something you have a natural talent for or something that brings you joy.

On the other hand, maybe not. Moses was sent to talk to Pharaoh and he had big issues with public speaking. David fought Goliath and he was slightly out gunned. God didn’t call them to do the easy. He asked them to stretch and grow and work. Who knows, maybe that’s the plan for you too?

How will we know? Well, we have to be in the word, be in prayer, be tuned in and we will find it. 

Then do it. Do the thing. 

Strive to help others “to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ” just like we learned in bible school.

Embrace the Deep and wide love.
Choose the Wide or deep life.

Sunday, January 10, 2021

Matilda's Big Adventure - Episode 1

 

Matilda Making a Hop for Adventure

Howdy, friends. The name’s Chester. I am a pecan connoisseur, a country music lover and a squirrel about town.  I see things. I read situations, and let me tell you, we have had some happenings around here today! It’s a tale of adventure, a tale of betrayal, and a tale of romance all rolled into one. Think Ruby Don’t Take Your Love to Town meets Save the Last Dance for Me. Wait, maybe it’s “Looking for Love in All the Wrong Places” meets “I Hope You Dance”. No, maybe it’s a…what? Oh yeah, back to my story. It all began last week…

She could feel her heart beating in her chest. It was a mixture of both fear and the exertion from digging. She was certain Helen was on to her plan, and hoped that her need for attention would not outweigh their bond of friendship. Bless her heart, with Helen you could never be sure.

“Focus, Matilda,” she scolded herself. The full moon would not last forever and she was certain this was a now or never opportunity.

She continued with the task at hand and let her mind wander. Maybe the “or never” was the better option. It was certainly the safest, but frankly she felt in her heart that she was created for more than safe. She was created to be extraordinary. Hadn’t her mother and father always told her she could do anything she set her mind to? Yet, she knew, they would be the first ones to question her current plan. She was also aware that they could easily change her mind. She loved them so and their approval was treasured. They had certainly provided her a safe and happy place to grow up. She had never wanted for anything. Well, she had never wanted for any basic need. But she was no Basic Bunny – that was for sure. She had big dreams!

              A stubborn root brought her mind back to the task at hand. Dig, dig to the right. Dig, dig, dig to the left. She grunted. Ugh! Maybe she could gnaw it? She gave it a try, being careful not to get mud on her head. Someone would surely notice that and then she’d have a thousand questions to answer. She did love her siblings, but they are a nosy bunch! There are five kids in the family: Mathew, Millie, Matilda, Mary Lou, and little Meyekaill (pronounced like Michael. I know friends, I know. There’s really no explaining how parents come up with some of this stuff.) Matilda is the 2nd oldest of the three girls. Their home was always full of love and laughter…and mischief.

              Suddenly and victoriously, the root snapped. In the quiet of the night the sound was like a shot. Matilda froze. Slowly, she looked around and then let out a long breath. Thankfully, no one seemed to notice. The younger two were once again in an argument about cheating in their hopscotch game and Millie, the perfect one, was grooming her beautiful fur. Mathew was of course far too grown up to be concerned with anything that she might find interesting. Matilda was relieved to see that the digging was much easier now that the root was out of the way. Just a little more work for the night then she would need to rest.  At this rate she felt confident that she would break through to the other side of the fence day after tomorrow at the latest. Then the real part of her brave plan would start.

              Now friends, as with all good stories, we understand that not everything goes as planned. No, to be sure, there was no way Matilda could know about the storm that was coming. There was no way to plan for the great sky bursts. The combination of the two would create a serious and discouraging delay. Give me a minute to stuff my cheeks with these tasty acorns and I will continue with the story. Huh? What’s a sky burst; you ask? Well, to be honest, I’m not 100% sure, but I do know that twice a year and after the home team wins in the fall the sky around here lights up with them. There’s a lot of booms, and crackles, and colors, and I’ll tell you, they sure look purty to an ol’ squirrel like me. To young bunnies, however, they can be quite scary.

Let’s return to our story…

              Matilda stealthily dug the next night, without root interference. She could feel a light breeze and knew her tunnel to freedom was basically complete. Tomorrow she would bust through and head out to find adventure and hopefully love in the big world beyond. Love wasn’t her main goal, of course. She was strong. She was independent. She also wanted babies, and as sweet as Helen’s brother Henry was, she didn’t want to end up settled down and married to a local bunny before she’d at least seen her options. She knew what the others would say. She didn’t care. She was going to experience life. End. Of. Story!

Uh, folks, that just a figure of speech. This story is not over just yet! Please stay with me.

              So, one week from the night the jolly man in the red suit (yes, Santa!) came to visit, Matilda began to say her goodbyes. Of course, her family could not know she was saying goodbye. Though they would surely realize once she was gone. She had to say farewell in her own way to keep her plan intact. So, she was extra helpful when her mom got dinner ready and dug and fluffed everyone’s bedding. She laughed at her father’s bad jokes. She played hopscotch with the littles, just a little longer than she usually took the time. She even sat with Millie and listened as she droned on about shiny ears and the importance of a fluffy, puffy tail. Mathew was off with his friends and it was just as well. They had very little in common anymore.

              Helen was her hardest goodbye, of course. They went for a hop around the yard and talked and laughed as best friends are known to do. The time passed too quickly and as they hopped along it started snowing heavily. It was time to return to their families. When the hugged goodbye, Matilda held on a little longer. In fact, she might have broken down and shared her plan if it weren’t that at that very moment, the first sky burst occurred.

              Helen shrieked and scurried to her parents as quick as her paws would go. Matilda was startled at first. It was shocking explosion that came seemingly from out of nowhere.  Like Helen, she had cried out despite herself and had started to run, but then her natural curiosity took over. She stared up at the sky. They really were beautiful. She was mesmerized. First a red one then a blue. The silver ones that went up the highest and fizzled at the end of each light petal were her favorite.

              “Matilda! Come here, right this instant!” Her father’s stern voice brought her back to reality. “I’ve called you 5 times! You have to pay attention!”

              “I’m coming, Father!”, she called as she turned to run toward the familiar and safe hutch that her family had lived in her whole life.

              “What were you thinking, child?” her father asked.

“The sky bursts are so beautiful” she responded breathlessly.

“Hmph! The world is much more dangerous than you understand,” her father scolded, “Even the beautiful things can sometimes bring harm.”

Matilda climbed into the warm straw with the rest of her family. She felt cold and it wasn’t just because of the think snowflakes that were rapidly falling. No, she was cold inside, too. And disappointed. Her plan was clearly postponed for now. She sniffled. Maybe forever. She trembled. Her mother, thinking it was due to the fright from the sky burst, comforted cuddled her and spoke soothing words. Tomorrow, everything will be better.

Her mother was wrong. The next morning was awful. It was so very cold. Everyone knew it was so very cold, not just because they could feel it for themselves, but because Millie was constantly reminding them, “I am so very cold!” Over and over again she complained. Matilda was annoyed. The littles were arguing. The combination of disappointment, bickering and complaining was almost more than she could take. She really needed to go check on the damage to her escape tunnel, but no one would be venturing away from the hutch-sun today.

In fact, it was two days before she was able to cautiously go check on things. She fretted to herself as she tried to hop nonchalantly to the secluded spot. What if the snow had caved in the tunnel? What if the melt had flooded it? She stopped in her tracks. Oh no! She hadn’t even thought of the most awful scenario that was playing out before her eyes. The friendly Caregiver was there. The snow had made her tunnel more visible and he must have spotted it. He was filling her hard – dug hole with stones. This was the worst possible thing. This might mean she was back at square one. Defeated, she hopped back home.

“Just where have you been?” Mathew asked, leaning on the doorway to the hutch.

“Why do you care?” Matilda snapped back while fighting back tears.

“Look, I know you think I don’t care about you, but I am your big brother and I do see a lot more than you can understand.”

“You are the one who doesn’t understand!”

“Oh really? Well, I understand that you are a dreamer. I know that you have big plans. And I know that you have an escape tunnel and are ready to run.”

“Had.”

“what?”

“I had an escape tunnel. Now though, between The Caregiver and the snow my tunnel is destroyed.” Matilda began to sob, “and so are my dreams.”

“Uh? There, there?” Mathew awkwardly consoled. Crying girls made him so uncomfortable. “It may not be as bad as seems. Hop with me, sister.”

As they hopped, Mathew talked about his own dreams. He talked about how as a younger bunny he too had longed to see beyond the fence. He also told her in deep confidence about how a chance meeting with a sweet girl named Suzette had changed his life forever.

“She wants kids. She wants to be respected in our community,” Mathew explained, “What can I say? The truth of the matter is I want her.”

Matilda could hardly believe her long ears. Her brother was in love? It seemed crazy at first, but she was truly happy for him. As they talked, she began to realize he was willing to help her with her plan. He told her about a couple of friends who had been known to move some rocks for a price. Matilda lamented that she didn’t really have that in her budget. Mathew explained about some favors that were owed him. Soon, a new plan was in action, and Matilda would be waiting for the sign.

Five days later, Matilda and Helen were hopping about the garden, nibbling on lettuce. Mathew ran up breathlessly, “NOW! The time is now!” he exclaimed.

“but, what?” Matilda stammered. That was not the agreed upon signal.

“Now is not the time for code words! Now is the time to goooo! The boys have busted through and more snow is coming tomorrow.” Mathew was rushing and turning to scurry toward the tunnel.

“What the heck is going on here?” stomped Helen.

“Oh, Helen! I don’t have time to explain” Matilda quickly hugged her dearest friend and turned to follow her brother.

Realization washed over Helen.

“Not without me you don’t! Real friends stick together!” She yelled as she also joined in the foot race over to the fence where Mathew was already quickly giving some last-minute advice.

“Move quick but cautiously as you can to the big tree. Pause there and catch your breath. Listen for sounds that the Zumi has sensed your presence. Once you are certain it’s safe. Run. And I mean run as fast as you have ever run in your life to the next fence. Go under and you should be safe as there in not a known dog in that area.” Mathew paused for a breath. “Sister. There is one other danger. One-Eyed Jack.”

“Oh Mathew! That’s just some silly legend.” Matilda responded. “Some big tom cat with one eye and a tendency to stop and clean himself at whim is just a tale mothers tell their baby bunnies to make them behave.”

Mathew shuddered and suppressed a memory. “I can assure you that he is very real. Although, everyone hopes that he has moved on. You can never be too careful. You are bigger than him, but I assure you an encounter with Ol’ Jack would be very, very dangerous.”

“Now you must go! We’ve wasted too much time.”

Matilda quickly hugged her brother and started under the fence. Her head fit easily enough but the rest of her took a little pushing. She was finally under, but it was not as easy as she’d planned considering her winter fur layer. Following Mathew’s advice, she made a beeline for the big tree. Behind her she could hear Helen wiggling under the fence. Her dear friend would be coming too apparently.

“Uh, Matilda?” Helen cautiously asked as she high-tailed it to the big tree. “What’s a Zumi?”

“Shhhhh! Please keep your voice down. She will hear us. “Matilda scolded. She paused and listened closely. Satisfied she whispered to Helen, “I think the coast is clear. Let’s make a run for it.”

The two friends made the long journey to the opposite fence in record time. They scooched under the fence leaving normal behind, their adventure had officially begun.

 

 

Friday, January 1, 2021

January 2021 Goals

1. Daily bible study

2. No eating out alone / No fast food

3. Stick with budget

4. Walk 30 miles

5. Schedule time to write each week

6. Skin care routine

7. Bed by 10:30

8. Christmas put away and storage area straightened up

9. Survive 1 year memorial

White as Snow






 I am sitting here in the early morning of the first day of 2021 and looking out at my backyard covered in snow. So beautiful. So fresh and clean.


Now, I know that under that blanket of snow, there are sticks, and leaves, and clover, and half destroyed dog toys.


 It's the same in our lives.


We could all use some raking and maintenance. I bet there's some clover-like habits that we are struggling to get rid of. Things that keep coming back and stealing our joy. We probably even have some things we just keep chewing on -  bitterness, resentment, guilt, anger - that are not doing us any good. Things that we simply need to throw away and move forward.  Thankfully, like the snow, Jesus covers our "ugly".


The words to this hymn come to mind...


"Jesus paid it all.

 All to him I owe. 

Sin had left a crimson stain. 

He washed it white as snow."


Thank you Lord, for a new year and a beautiful reminder of your grace!